KRAVEN THE HUNTER (2024)

Kraven the Hunter
Directed by J.C. Chandor
Written by Richard Wenk and Art Marcum & Matt Holloway
Starring Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Russell Crowe, Alessandro Nivola, Ariana DeBose, Fred Hechinger
Running time 2 hours and 7 minutes
Rated R by the MPA for strong bloody violence, and language
In theaters December 13

by "Doc" Hunter Bush, Staff Writer and Podcast Director

Everyone hoping for a threepeat embarrassing failure like Morbius and Madame Web can put their knives away. Kraven has plenty of knives already.

Drawing on Richard Connell's 1924 short story The Most Dangerous Game-- the ur text for all human-hunting in popular culture-- the comicbook character Kraven was introduced in the early '60s as a villain for Spider-Man. The nepo baby son of a Russian crimelord, the man known as Kraven was a big game hunter who came to New York to hunt Spidey; decidedly a greater challenge than your average man. Over the years, Kraven has died, been resurrected, passed down the mantle to his assorted kids, and occasionally united with heroes against greater threats.

The Sony/Columbia/Marvel version of the character is, much like Venom (and to a lesser extent, Morbius), playing up the character's few moments of vigilante antiheroism. Aaron Taylor-Johnson's Kraven is a man who rejects his father's evil empire, and the assumption that he would one day grow to take it over. He lives alone on some family land in Siberia, keeping his animal friends safe from poachers and occasionally hunting down evil men like his father-- but importantly, NOT his father.

In the sixteen years since he left home, he's gotten in incredible shape, and become a bit of a crime world urban legend: The Hunter. Hmm... a well-traveled rich kid with mommy/daddy damage uses his privilege and fortune to strike fear into the heart of criminals as a mononymed boogeyman... That's correct, studious reader, Sony are trying to have their cake (Spider-Man related audience recognition and draw) and eat it too (but he's Batman).

In their desire to make a more grounded Nolan-like superhero film, they have actually concocted a decent narrative with battling crime families and a good deal of satisfying violence. Dead meat goons are exsanguinated by blades, fall victim to traps and poisons, and one notably gets split in half! There is CGI bloodmist aplenty! Kraven, like a certain bat-themed gentleman, doesn't use guns. He drops a throw-away explanatory line about a true hunter "only using what you were born with", but then constantly uses knives, arrows, and other weapons he was not born with to kill his 'prey'. That self-owning tendency for screenwriters Richard Wenk, Art Marcum, and Matt Holloway to try to justify or explain everything is indicative of the big problem with Kraven as a film: it's trying SO HARD that it distracts from the fun you're having.

That's been an issue with all of Sony's non-Venom projects: the movies are so concerned with making the audience take silly stuff seriously, and promising future installments that they fail to properly embrace the silliness and make a truly engaging movie NOW, paradoxically ensuring that these promised future films never get made. Where Kraven stands apart is the movie happening now-- squished in between abundant backstory and a good deal of the aforementioned Sony Franchise Assurance Sickness©-- is actually good. It is at least not bad and it's nowhere near the disasters that Morbius (2022) and Madame Web (2024) were.

Aaron Taylor-Johnson is fun here, and carries the self-seriousness of this character pretty well. This shouldn't be a shock as ATJ has been regularly bringing it for years now, but I was pleasantly surprised by some supporting performances. Russell Crowe is, of course, doing his Russell Crowe thing-- which lately has consisted of being the only man Hollywood thinks can do an accent-- but it works just fine. Fred Hechinger as Kraven's cowering half-brother Dmitri gave me all the enjoyment of twitchy, early Joaquin Phoenix (a good thing); Alessandro Nivola makes a meal and a half out of his nascent crime lord with a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde condition; and Ariana DeBose does a fantastic job making her somewhat under-written occultist/lawyer play as really likable.

Yes, "occultist/lawyer". I told you there was silliness-- it's comicbooks, the silliness is implied!-- but even at Kraven's lowest points, it's just a bit corny. At the high points, it's really fun. ATJ doing parkour down the side of a luxury hotel, or throwing spears through a helicopter, or reading license plates from blocks away using his predator-vision-- like, in the bird of prey sense, not the Predator film series sense, even though that one does have its own famous POV-- it's the kind of cinematic junk food that appeals to me as a fan of genre silliness like Crank 2 (2009) or Face/Off (1997).

Ultimately, Kraven the Hunter is perfectly fine. Good, even. It could be better, but as we are well aware, it could have been SO MUCH worse. In a way, that's the greatest disappointment of the film as an object. Sony have apparently called it quits on their Spider-Man spin-off universe, so their delivering a half-decent offering feels like when your ex gives you a gift they bought before your split. Bittersweet. I'd sure enjoy this a lot more if I didn't know things were over.

Kraven the Hunter is in Theaters Friday, Dec. 13th, 2024

As a silly little bonus thing, here's a drawing I did of Kraven back in 2014:

EVERYTHING OLD IS NEW AGAIN - Vol. 27

EVERYTHING OLD IS NEW AGAIN
Vol. 27 - May 2021


By: Hunter Bush


Step right up! Step right up! Right his way, and welcome to another installment of EVERYTHING OLD IS NEW AGAIN, my column discussing upcoming movies & TV series through the lens of Adaptation, Remakes and the occasional Legacy Sequel. So if a movie (or series) is based on a previously existing intellectual property, I will endeavour to mention it here.



The way the column works, folks, is: I watch some trailers and, drawing on my lifetime of film watching experience, do my level best to give you an idea of what the movie (or series) is about. But that’s not all! I’ll attempt to give some context for the original property and maybe theorize about why this idea is coming around in this form, at this time. Finally I’ll let you know whether I personally am looking forward to this movie (or series). Howzabout that?

But wait! There’s more! Down at the bottom of the column is a SPOTLIGHT section, highlighting an EOINA-appropriate property that’s very good, it’s just not new this month! So follow me, right this way, to the hottest show in town!


<>


PREMIERS

There are all the movies (or series) premiering in May.

7th


Jupiter’s Legacy (series)
Where: Netflix

Based on the comic series by Mark Millar that deals with the concept of legacy (no surprise there) and the weight of responsibility, but told using superheroes, this series looks pretty good. Nice visuals, strong differentiation between characters, etc. The main ideological conflict seems to be between an older generation of super people - who we also see flashbacks of receiving their special abilities - and their children, the new generation. This concept is filled with potential but creator/comic author Mark Millar occasionally has some odd political viewpoints. As such, this seems to be leaning towards “The Olds are right and The Youth are frivolous” because we’ve got our Superman look-alike talking about that responsibility of legacy while the kids seem more interested in doing fashion photography. If the comic and this subsequent adaptation is genuinely expressing both sides of an ideological divide, I’ll be more interested in it than if it’s just a This Generation is Right and That One is Wrong screed. Of course, the trailer COULD be setting me up for a nice rope-a-dope. That IS a possibility. I’m hoping for the same level of melodrama as something like Riverdale, which understands how heightened it needs to be in order to work (also - read The Old Sport’s Riverdale Recaps). Though there is some of the prerequisite fist-fighting in the trailer, I got no real sense of what any physical altercations might be about. The majority of the dialogue is exploring that philosophical divide, which, as I said, I’m here for. Let’s see how this goes.

14th


Spiral: From the Book of Saw (dir. Darren Lynn Bousman)
Where: In theaters

A continuation of the franchise begun with James Wan & Leigh Whannell’s morality-death-trap obsessed Saw in 2003, this film takes place in Philadelphia! Therefore it is an automatic watch for me! But on top of that, it actually looks pretty great! Executive producer and star Chris Rock has been trying to get a project like this going for some time and I’m glad to see it happening here. Taking place some time after the original Jigsaw series of murders, a copycat has appeared, leaving a flash drive with a taunting message for detective Banks (Rock) that in some way involves his father (Samuel L. Jackson). The trailer seems to cover a lot of ground, with appearances from various death traps as well as the puppet and pig head mascots of the Jigsaw killer in addition to a marionette of a pig in a police uniform. There’s even a shot of Rock handcuffed to a pipe holding a hacksaw! A few years ago, I pulled my back out at work and ended up marathoning all the Saw movies (which at the time topped out at 7) and found that overall I really enjoyed the franchise and its determined efforts to twist back in on itself, altering things you thought you knew from the previous installments, even while I lamented their loss of the cohesive moral messaging that made the original feel so righteous. If this installment can maintain that kind of fleet-footed tone, while getting back to the series’ moral starting point, I’m all in. I’m still not gonna go to the theater for it though. Nah.


Those Who Wish Me Dead (dir. Taylor Sheridan)
Where: In theaters

Based on the novel by Michael Koryta, this flick looks rad! Angelina Jolie plays a fire marshall and/or forest ranger (I guess?) with survivor’s guilt who spots an injured kid (Finn Little) who is on the run from some possibly government affiliated bad guys who killed his dad and are now looking to do the same to him to tie up loose ends. Of course, given Jolie’s character’s backstory, they end up starting a forest fire to either drive them out or kill them. This looks extremely up my alley and about the only complaint I have with it is the shitbird remix of the Johnny Cash version of “God’s Gonna Cut You Down” where they added a thumpy drum thing to the rhythm of Queen’s “We Will Rock You” for some ungodly reason? Why do this? Hollywoo’: Stop Doing This! Either find a song that fits or just use an instrumental. It’s not quite as bad as that Breathy Acoustic Covers of Popular Songs thing that was happening ad nauseum a few years back, but it’s still not what I’d call Good. Those Who Wish Me Dead however, looks fun as hell and I definitely will see it. Just not in theaters yet though. Nah.


The Woman in the Window (dir. Joe Wright)
Where: Netflix

Based on the novel by A.J. Finn, this was all set for release last year before *gestures at everything for the last 14 months* so now it’s coming to Netflix. And honestly? That rules because this looks like a really decent thriller! Agoraphobic Amy Adams sees the murder of her neighbor across the way, Jane (Julianne Moore) from the window of her apartment, only to be told by Moore’s husband (Gary Oldman) that Adams has never met his wife. Another woman then appears claiming to be the real Jane and then the authorities start doubting Adams’ claims. This has a LOT of strong, very creepy vibes, like when Adams opens an email to find a photo of her sleeping. Imagine how terrifying that feeling is, then multiply it by the factor of ten that comes with her apartment being the ONLY place she feels safe! That’s good stuff, emotionally! There’s also a strong visual sense to this one (Adams’ meds can cause hallucinations, so that gives director Joe Wright a lot of room to play) AND the cast features Anthony Mackie and Wyatt Russell, both recently of Falcon and the Winter Soldier, among others. This looks like a good time and if the worst thing about it is that it’s a competently shot Rear Window meets Copycat knock off with a stacked cast, that’s really not so bad, right?

P.S. - Remember Copycat, where Sigourney Weaver is an agoraphobic CSI specialist being targeted from jail by Harry Connick Jr. with janky “white trash” teeth? That’s a good time.

21st


Marvel’s M.O.D.O.K. (series)
Where: Hulu

This stop-motion styled sitcom take on the Marvel comics character created by Stan Lee & Jack Kirby in 1967 looks really silly and fun! MODOK (Patton Oswalt) is a would-be world conquering super villain by day and a family man by night. Yes he’s got a giant head and floats around in a hover-throne, commanding hordes of henchmen but he’s also trying to save his marriage. Or at least retain custody of his kids. This is fertile ground for a comedy show, especially with this voice cast (which includes Whoopie Goldberg, Jon Hamm, Bill Hader & Nathan Fillion) and while the toyetic look of the series might not be everyone’s thing, I’m definitely onboard.

28th


Cruella (dir. Craig Gillespie)
Where: In theaters and Disney+ Pay-Even-More Access tier

Based on the 1961 animated film One Hundred and One Dalmatians, this isn’t the first project to spin off from the property. It had a long-gap animated sequel in 2003, a 1996 live action adaptation with its own sequel, and a pair of animated TV series that ran from 1997-1998 and 2019-2020 respectively! That’s a lot of dogs. Which brings me to my next point: Woof. This looks atrocious. Remember in Clueless, when Cher tells Tai “She’s like a full-on Monet. From far away it’s okay, but up close it’s a big ol’ mess”? That’s how I feel with Cruella. The closer I look, the worse it all is. Do we need another movie that humanizes one of Disney’s best-known, least sympathetic villains (following in the footsteps of the Maleficent films of course)? How about if it’s a straight-up rip off of The Devil Wears Prada, but with a dash of The Joker thrown in? And, y’know what, let’s also steal the setting-your-clothes-on-fire-to-make-an-entrance bit from The Hunger Games? Why not? I am not on board with anything about this beyond the look - the costumes and outfits are fantastic! So Disney is just going full Style Over Substance then, yeah? Basically reversing the polarity on the ethos that earned them their reputation (not to mention All. That. Cash.)? Count me out.


SPOTLIGHT

Films (or series) that are EOINA-appropriate but not exactly new.

1st:


The Towering Inferno (dir. John Guillermin)
Where: Amazon Prime

Combining elements of TWO novels - The Tower by Richard Martin Stern and The Glass Inferno by Thomas N. Scotia and Frank M. Robinson - this flick essentially invented the concept of star-studded disaster flick, paving the way for every ensemble cast that followed after. The pacing might be a little pokey for modern audiences, but once things stop simmering, they basically never slow down until the end! This perfectly handles the rising action that so many other flicks fumble. Something is always going wrong, but almost never in the way you might expect! I fully recommend watching this if you never have.


The Iron Giant (dir. Brad Bird)

Where: Hulu

Based on the 1968 novel The Iron Man by Ted Hughes, I recommend this to anybody at any time. Gorgeously animated, wonderfully odd with a truly beautiful message, this is also the movie that introduced the world to Vin Diesel. Groot himself! The “Fambly” Man! The Iron Giant, as a character, has been popping up recently now that all intellectual properties are owned by only a handful of corporations and he’s constantly kicking ass and taking names ...which is 100% the opposite of that character’s ENTIRE THING! So if you, like me, watched Ready Player One out of morbid curiosity and found yourself infuriated and sickened, maybe watch or rewatch The Iron Giant to remind yourself of how good things can be sometimes, when they’re NOT owned by a mega-corporation that has a hole full of money where its heart should be.

<>

About a week after this drops, I’ll be getting my 2nd vaccination shot and eventually hope to return to some kind of normalcy but it won’t be quite yet. I’m glad that some of these long-in-Limbo films are getting released but there is literally NOTHING that I want less than to be in a crowded theater full of strangers. But that’s just me. I hope you’re all getting vaxxed, and staying safe, and taking care of yourself and others.

That’s all for this month, folks! Thanks as always for reading! Check out a recent episode of Hate Watch/Great Watch, the podcast I co-host with Allison Yakulis, which is not only our Two Years On-the-Air Anniversary, but covers the entire Beethoven film franchise! Until next time - don’t take any wooden nickels and Long Live the Movies!

_______________________________________________

This piece was written for Moviejawn where you can find tons of other excellent movie-centric writings, a shop where you can subscribe to the quarterly physical zine and also listen to the  I Saw It In a Movie,  Cinematic Crypt  or  Hate Watch / Great Watch  podcasts!

_______________________________________________

EVERYTHING OLD IS NEW AGAIN - Vol. 25

 Hail and well met, internet scroller! Welcome to EVERYTHING OLD IS NEW AGAIN, my column focused on Remakes, Adaptations and Long-Gap Sequels (a.k.a. Legacy Sequels). If a movie (or TV show) is based on some previously existing concept, it probably counts and I’ll probably talk about it.

So what’s new with all of you? If you think I’m just being “cute” because I can’t hear your responses, I encourage you to drop a comment below: tell me what actually IS new with you! What are YOU working on? What are YOU excited about? Because I’m extremely excited to be handling the MovieJawn Podcast Network! It’s a lot of logistics, not usually always my strong suit - I’m an Idea Man, not traditionally a Details Guy - but I’m having a lot of fun with it. We just dropped the premier episode of our newest pod Killer Bs (all about B-movie/genre/character actors) and you should listen to it HERE.

But enough about podcasts (for now…), we’re here to talk about MOVIES, baybee! So let’s do that. The way EOINA works is: I watch trailers for all appropriate films/series, summarize the (for lack of a better term) vibe I’m getting from the project, give my best educated guess as to where things might be headed and let you know whether I’ll be tuning in.

PREMIERS

These are all the movies coming to the various streaming services in March.

4th:

Pacific Rim: The Black (season 1)

Where: Netflix

Based in the same universe as the 2013 Guillermo del Toro original that pitted dual-piloted giant mecha called Jaegers (German for “Hunter”) against the equally giant monstrous Kaiju (Japanese for “Strange Beast”) this animated series for Netflix follows a teenage brother and sister who have been in hiding in their unspecified city for 5 years following a devastating Kaiju attack, waiting for their parents to return. Somehow they stumble into a hidden hanger that houses an unused Jaeger which is still powered-up and just needs pilots, so the siblings suit up and set off to find their parents. I loved the original Pacific Rim quite a bit and while I’m not adverse to a YA series set in that world, there are a lot of really convenient things at play in just the trailer: Stumbling into a government facility? The Jaeger being fully operational? Didn’t it take whole teams to run the systems that allowed the Jaegers to operate, like a NASA command center? Etc. So while I am fully on board to check this out, I’m not sure I’ll be able to completely suspend my disbelief to the degree that I’d want to. Beyond that, the art looks pretty decent - it resembles the style of the Netflix Godzilla animated movies from the last few years but smoother and less janky - and I’m literally never not in the mood for a giant monster movie / series, so I will definitely be checking this out, I just hope it can hook me and tell me a decent story.

5th:

Coming 2 America (dir. Craig Brewer)

Where: Amazon Prime

The long-gap sequel to 1988’s original, Coming 2 America finds Akeem (Eddie Murphy) returning to New York with his friend and aide Semmi (Arsenio Hall) to find his (male) heir. The first trailer didn’t make a very convincing argument for this flick’s existence beyond watching Murphy & Hall - who both look amazing btw! - rehash gags and characters from the original, luckily there exists a second trailer. This one establishes that Akeem’s home nation of Zamunda is under threat of a coup (imagine that) from wannabe ruler General Izzy (my man Wesley Snipes) and also adds some modern day social context in the form of Meeka, Akeem’s daughter (you can tell because her name is his name backwards) who would be a fine ruler except that “A woman isn’t allowed to rule Zamunda. It’s the law.” It’s not that I’m necessarily dying for the characters from a 33 year-old comedy to weigh in on modern social issues, but the inclusion of some new ground for them to cover makes me infinitely more interested in watching that just the shallow retread I first took this for.

19th:

The Falcon and The Winter Solider (episode 1)

Where: Disney+

Just a few weeks after the finale of WandaVision (Ryan Silberstein’s recaps of which can be read HERE), Disney+ is back in the Marvel expanded cinematic universe game with The Falcon and the Winter Soldier. We last saw these boys (Anthony Mackie & Sebastian Stan respectively) in Avengers: Endgame where they left things on seemingly decent footing. However, this trailer opens with them in whatever amounts to the Marvel espionage world’s equivalent of couples counselling. They seem to be butting heads over each other’s way of doing things or possibly who should be the leader, though potentially it’s over who should get to wield Captain America’s famous shield (in the comics both Sam and Bucky have been Captains America at some point or another). Beyond that, we don’t get too much info on what the series might be about: Zemo (Daniel Brühl) - the villain from The Avengers: Age of Ultron - has returned, carrying a purple mask that’s a bit of nerdy fanservice which I totally popped for as has international spy Sharon Carter (Emily VanCamp)! If I’m being honest, what’s got me most hyped about this after seeing the trailer ...is another show entirely. WandaVision did such an enjoyable and entertaining job of keeping me invested in these characters, and of growing the universe, that it actually gives me hope that F&WS will exceed its seeming Mission-of-the-Week spy set-up and do the same!

25th:

DOTA: Dragon’s Blood (season 1)

Where: Netflix

Let’s get some infodumping out of the way: DOTA is a MOBA. Are you unfamiliar with either of these acronyms? Ok boomer, I’ll explain them for you (I’m kidding; I myself am a million years old). DOTA stands for Defense of the Ancients and is the title of a series of Multiplayer Online Battle Arena games, the modern incarnation of real-time strategy games like Starcraft and Warcraft (the original DOTA was a mod built on top of one of the Warcraft sequels actually). What that all means is that the player is in a league with other players against rival leagues of players, all using magic and weaponry to kill each other and claim land or special tokens or what have you. What’s that got to do with being adapted into another of Netflix’s anime series? Well, the lore in DOTA is pretty cool and reasonably elaborate and that’s kind of a huge thing in certain corners of the gaming world. There are whole YouTube accounts that do nothing but unpack the lore of various properties, from Destiny to Dungeons and Dragons. Anywhere that a story is being doled out in little, sometimes conflicting bits and bobs, you’ll find some industrious nerd willing to parse it all out. So anyway, DOTA exists in a fantasy setting not unlike the aforementioned D&D. There were a lot of bulletpoints being thrown at me in the trailer but the key conflict seems to revolve around some magic lotus flowers, the possession of which will make someone the goddess of the moon? So those get stolen in some sort of power bid. There’s also a knight named Devion who wants to kill all dragons for some reason and he teams up with a lady archer who wants to steal back the lotuses. I’m not really sure who any of these characters are, or whom I should be rooting for, but if I’m being honest I love this kind of lore. I know about those lore-heavy podcasts because I enjoy hearing these elaborate mythologies laid out in a satisfyingly linear fashion. Will Dragon’s Blood give that to me? Maybe. Here’s hoping.

26th:

Invincible (season 1)

Where: Amazon Prime

This animated series based on the Image Comics series created by Robert Kirkman & artist Cory Walker looks great! Kirkman (creator of The Walking Dead) has a knack for taking a story that feels threadbare and finding new angles with which to appreciate it, so when I tell you that Invincible is the story about a kid (Steven Yeun) whose father (J.K. Simmons) is a superhero, and who longs for superpowers of his own, trust that things are not going to consistently play out in ways you are familiar. This book (most of which I have read) is so full of fantastic twists and character growth as well as a really satisfying weight applied to its more violent moments, I’ve been recommending it to people for years! Hard to say for sure whether this Amazon series will deliver the same dopamine high, but with the quality of animation (very similar to the book’s art style which was maintained by artist Ryan Ottley) and as stacked a voice cast as this thing has (come for the Jason Mantzoukas, stay for dozen or so other greats including Michael Dorn!) at the very least I’ll be entertained!

The Mighty Ducks: Game Changers (episode 1)

Where: Disney+

It may be hard to understand if you weren’t there (hashtag only ‘90s kids will understand) but in the ‘90s The Mighty Ducks had a Moment. The original 1992 film spawned two sequels, a bizarre cartoon (seriously - it involves a race of sentient ducks from a world where hockey is everything, embroiled in a forever war with a race of conqueror lizard people) and, wildest of all perhaps, an actual hockey team (still active)! This latest series, despite a line of dialogue dropped early in the trailer stating “...little different than the Ducks of the ‘90s.” seems like exactly the same story: group of misfits bad at hockey seek out former hockey great Gordon Bombay (Emilio Estevez) to coach them. I dunno, I like The Mighty Ducks just fine but don’t really know that I need to watch it again in a new form. Like, I can just watch the original if I so crave, yes? I kind of wish there was another trailer that gave me a better idea of what else might be going on in this series, if anything. There are some decent laughs in the trailer though - particularly when one kid (Maxwell Simkins - Philadelphia native!) who says he has “more of a podcast body” which made me laugh, not just because I could sympathize but he nailed that delivery. So maybe this series can get by on the charm of its cast alone (that has been hockey-mom Lauren Graham’s steez since forever, so...)? 

The Irregulars (season 1)

Where: Netflix

This Sherlock Holmes spin-off only has a teaser trailer, not a full one, so I’m going off of the barest bones here, but it actually looks vaguely interesting. In the Holmes stories, “the Baker Street Irregulars” were orphans and urchins that Holmes paid to be his eyes and ears as to the goings-on of London, since it’s not exactly a small place. I don’t know that they’re ever explicitly aged, but in my head they were kids; the Oliver Twist type image of orphans has become inextricably linked in my head to London as a city. The first of The Irregulars’ changes is to age them up so that they’re all steamy teens with ...I dunno simmering loins and hormonal drama, or whatever. More interestingly, this also heavily implies that the central mystery involves magic. Sherlock Holmes stories & their various adaptations have skirted around magic occasionally but as far as I recall they’ve always ended up being explained through Victorian-era science. This Irregulars trailer is primarily a trail of blue CGI fire circuitously racing across a map of London with narration about evil that uses phrases like “...shadow of a nightmare…” and the like, and shows footage that includes what appears to be a man igniting from the inside with the same blue flame and later a women apparently breathing similarly blue steam? I’m wondering if what makes them “irregular” in this new context is some kind of bobo X-Men mutant powers? I might check this out as my partner (Allison Yakulis) loves Sherlock Holmes things but our continued interest will depend on either the pure quality of their addition to Holmes as a conceptual property or, if things get truly wild, the talent and watchability of the cast. 

SPOTLIGHT

These are some EOINA-appropriate flicks that, though they’re not premiers, are still worth a look:

1st:

Constantine (dir. Francis Lawrence)

Where: HBO Max

Keanu Reeves starring in an adaptation of a comic book whose main character is a snarky film noir-esque supernatural crime solver? OF COURSE I like this movie! But, and this is what’s really important, it’s really damn good. When supernatural detective John Constantine (Reeves) is hired by a beautiful dame (Rachel Weisz) to investigate the suspicious death of her twin sister, he quickly realizes that he’d be in over his head if he was anyone other than John Constantine. There’s a ton of really fun and engaging world building (which I LOVE), great action and a stellar supporting cast (Pruitt Taylor Vince, Djimon Hounsou, Peter Stormare! - a beautifully ambiguous Tilda Swinton! - Bush singer Gavin Rossdale?) and a fantastic lead performance from Keanu. The same sort of beaten-down confidence and reluctance to escalate a situation that will serve him well in the John Wick franchise are on full display here, plus some really brilliant pitch black humor. A personal favorite. The pic above features a piece of my art inspired by a scene from the flick, made for a friend who also loves it (Hi Sandy!).

5th:

Iron Mask (2019) (dir. Oleg Stepchenko)

Where: Hulu

This flick is not what you might traditionally call “good”. It doesn’t make what you might traditionally call “sense”, the stakes and rules are not what you might traditionally call “clear”, the little CGI pseudo-Pokémonster looks like what you might traditionally call “Chris Kattan”. BUT. It’s a lot of fun if you can get on its level. Inspired by a bunch of myths and legends all poured into a blender and intended to appeal to an international audience, this movie features a fight scene between Arnold Schwarzenegger (who I *think* is supposed to be British in this?!?!) and Jackie Chan (long may he reign)! What more could you possibly need to know? Monsters, magic, wuxia action and honestly great lighting abound. If you like the batshit crazy, sure-why-not, anything can happen style of Big Trouble in Little China, I can’t imagine you being disappointed in Iron Mask. 

<>

This is a film-light / TV series-heavy EOINA which is maybe unsurprising given the past year’s difficulties. I hope wherever you are, reading this, that you’re safe and healthy and doing everything to stay that way. Thank you as always for reading and for potentially sharing this with friends (?). If you’ve got something to say about the column, or about any of the items covered, feel free to leave a comment below or on social media! Follow the MJ Podcast Network and my own pod (co-hosted by Allison Yakulis) Hate Watch / Great Watch - we’re about to drop our 50th episode! I’m very proud of us and I hope you’ll check it out. Until next time, Long Live the Movies!

_________________________________________________

This piece was written for Moviejawn where you can find tons of other excellent movie-centric writings, a shop where you can subscribe to the quarterly physical zine and also listen to the  I Saw It In a Movie,  Cinematic Crypt  or  Hate Watch / Great Watch  podcasts!

__________________________________________________

"AVENGERS: ENDGAME (2019)"

It's fair to say I was suffering from a spell of Franchise Fatigue leading up to my viewing of Avengers: Endgame but...that may be the perfect headspace to go into it with?

Do you realize it hasn't even been a full year since Avengers: Infinity War came out (or Endgame: Part One if ya nasty) but in that time, two other Marvel movies have hit theaters? Wanna know where Ant-Man was when Thanos blew into town? You've gotta see Ant-Man and the Wasp. And then you've gotta go see Captain Marvel (who was teased in the Infinity War post-credit stinger) so you'll know...who the hell that even is. It's starting to feel like homework.

Tim Alien in CAPTAIN MARVEL

Watching the CAPTAIN MARVEL trailers for the upcoming installment of the column I write when I spotted this familiar-looking blue so-and-so:

It's not just me, right?

Blackbolt & Captain Marvel in CAPE FEAR

It's less of a capital T- Thing nowadays but I grew up in an era where comics didn't have the widespread pop-cultural appeal they do now. So whenever I see references to real comic books or comic characters in movies, but especially respected, not-for-kids movies, I pop (to use the wrestling terminology). Basically the forever-pre-teen version of myself that lives in my head sees a comic reference and yells "Aw, sweet!"

So that just happened again the other day, re-watching Cape Fear (1991) when I spotted these in Max Cady's (Robert De Niro's) prison cell collage:

"Avengers: Infinity War (2018)"

———————————————————————————————
The following is my original, unedited article written for MovieJawn,
(though honestly they didn't edit much of anything, really).
Plus some more pictures for added pizzazz.
Enjoy!
———————————————————————————————

I've seen Avengers: Infinity War! I've seen it, gang and I was sworn to secrecy about it! For real. I wasn't even supposed to tell anyone that I was going or where or when! I dunno about you, but I'd never had a major entertainment monopoly give me the "this stays between us" agreement. What would happen if I told people? Maybe Hulk would come and crush my favorite DVDs into dust or Scarlet Witch would hex me so french fries would taste like drywall forever? The theoretical horrors are endless... but probably Captain America would just show up (with that beard) and just tell me how disappointed he was in me. And that would hurt worst of all.