EVERYTHING OLD IS NEW AGAIN - Vol. 24

Greetings and salutations and welcome to the first Everything Old Is New Again of the NEW! MovieJawn! I mentioned in my last column that there were going to be some changes happening on the MJ site and now, reading this, you're knee-deep in 'em! They're more than just cosmetic changes to boot, as they include some restructuring of the MJ crew and the absorption of a bunch of the talented folks from Cinema76. I mention this all, not only because it's exciting and fun and super cool, but it actually means that I - me, hi, hello - I am now the Associate Editor, Podcasts for the entire Moviejawn site!

You can read up a little bit more about the direction of the MovieJawn Podcast Network HERE (PLEASE INSERT LINK TO ANNOUNCEMENT LETTER), but in brief, we're compiling all the pods produced by assorted Jawnies onto the site and we hope you'll give them all a listen - see what you like! We also have many exciting things coming up but those are TOP SECRET so don't ask.

And also February contains my birthday, so - big month for me.

But we're here to talk MOVIES! If you're new to EOINA, what I cover is upcoming flicks based on some pre-existing property. Maybe it's based on an older movie, or a TV series, book, comic, or anything really; I'll watch the trailer, give you my impression and hopefully put something new on your watch-list. I'll also spotlight a few things coming to streaming services that, while not a brand-spanking-new release, maybe deserve to have their moment in the spotlight.

Enjoy!

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PREMIERS

These are all the movies premiering on the various streaming services in February.

5th:

EARWIG AND THE WITCH - HBO Max - The latest release from Studio Ghibli, this computer animated feature is based on the Diana Wynn Jones novel. The animation is gorgeous and from what I gather, a young orphan (Taylor Henderson) is adopted by a pair of supernatural weirdos named Bella Yaga (Vanessa Marshall) and The Mandrake (Richard E. Grant) who have a talking cat (Dan Stevens, bay-bee!!!). From the title, I would guess that the girl's name was Earwig but a boy orphan calls her "Erica" and then later she finds an album in an old car and the performer's/band's name seems to be Earwig? Either way, there's a line of dialogue from The Mandrake about how "...a hole left by a witch can only be filled by a witch", which when combined with the footage in the trailer makes me believe that the musician Earwig is the young girl's mother and is also a witch, who left Bella Yaga and The Mandrake to become a musician? Or maybe they were all a band and something happened to the singer so they adopted Maybe Erica to be the new singer? These are just guesses and they don't matter AT ALL because I'm a complete sucker for Ghibli flicks and cannot wait for this! A bonus: the song "Don't Disturb Me", rules!

7th:

WE BARE BEARS: THE MOVIE - HBO Max - Based on the Cartoon Network series created by Daniel Chong, this animated feature follows the three bear bros (Eric Edelstein as Grizzly, Bobby Moynihan as Panda, Dementri Martin as Ice Bear) as they finally cross the line. After some recent ursine shenanigans enrage the citizens of the San Francisco area, they decide to work with fish & wildlife agent Trout (Marc Evan Jackson) to run the bears out of town ...to Canada! Road trip hijinks seem to ensue including an origin story flashback and an all animal rave! This show is cute and all but I don't see how this would differ from just watching 2 hours worth of episodes?

12th:

THE MAP OF TINY PERFECT THINGS - Amazon Prime - Based on the novel by Lev Grossman (The Magicians), this high concept teen romance finds 17 year-olds Mark (Kyle Allen) and Margaret (Kathryn Newton) stuck in a Groundhog Day-style loop, and as so often is the case, these sorts of things never seem to happen when you want them to. While Mark is unsure of what he wants to be when he grows up, Margaret wants to be a NASA mission specialist (which Mark & I both agree is very cool). They're falling in love while they're stuck in the same day over and over and they're collecting perfect things. It's cute; you get it. The titular Map is something Mark draws of the perfect things' locations around town. BUT then comes an ominous "there was more to the story" line. My guess is that she's dying? Seems like the current young adult literature trend is to give one of them a terminal illness. Used to be rival families, but the times, they have a-changed. I personally am a bit done with Groundhog Day-style loops, especially when they try and shrug it off within the narrative by pointing out to you that that's exactly what they are.

26th:

TOM AND JERRY - HBO Max - That wacky, violent, mute cat & mouse duo created in 1940 by Hanna & Barbera are back and causing trouble in the big city. In a world where I think all animals are cartoons, but everything else is real life, Jerry (the mouse) has taken up residence in a swanky hotel that's about to "host the wedding of the century" according to the head concierge Terrence (Michael Peña). He makes it the responsibility of young professional Kayla (Chloë Grace Moretz) to take care of their mouse problem before the word gets out so Moretz hires Tom (the cat, obvs) and all hell breaks loose (also obvs). The thing that's really strange about the cartoon animals in a real world setting is how the people (or at least CGM) are super blasé about when they do anthropomorphized things - for instance Jerry gives Moretz a business card and she's fine with that. Oh I forgot to mention that Ken Jeong is here playing the hotel's chef! This looks just weird enough to be fun!

THE UNITED STATES VS. BILLIE HOLIDAY - Hulu - Based on the novel Chasing the Scream: The First and Last Days of the War on Drugs by Johann Hari, this film from director Lee Daniels (The Butler) if centered around the United States' government's attempts to threaten, coerce, and bully Billie Holiday, whom they viewed as an agitator. She was outspoken and made art (specifically her song Strange Fruit which is central to the trailer) that addressed socio-political issues of the time, so the powers that be decided to focus on her drug use as a way to target her. Andra Day plays Holiday and her performance looks just absolutely incredible. I absolutely want to see this.

SPOTLIGHT

These are some EOINA-appropriate flicks that, though they're not premiers, are still worth a look:

18th:

SONIC THE HEDGEHOG (2020) - Amazon Prime & Hulu - This big screen adaptation of the flagship Sega Genesis title released in 1991 is finally available on streaming and it's surprisingly good! I actually just saw this a few weeks back for the first time and thought it was extremely charming. I'll level with you: there is NO reason this movie should work as well as it does: the jokes are mostly very corny, and the plot only kind of makes sense (especially as an adaptation of the games) but the cast is just so damn likeable. The dangerously hilarious Ben Schwartz voices Sonic, with James Marsden as his human pal Tom (a.k.a. Donut Lord) and Jim Carrey - in classic Jim Carrey mode - as Dr. Robotnik! This isn't going to change your life or anything, but I can't imagine you not having a good time and maybe dusting off the Genesis when you're done. Read The Old Sport's review HERE btw.

25th:

DREDD (2012) - Hulu - This sci-fi action movie slipped past most people's radar and that's a shame because it absolutely crushes! If you're not especially a fan of action, skip down to the closing paragraphs but, if you're still here, let me tell you about Dredd. Sure it's an adaptation of a British comic book character created for 2000 A.D. in 1977 by John Wagner, Carlos Ezquerra and Pat Mills, but you don't need any kind of familiarity to get into this one. In that regard it's a bit like Mad Max: Fury Road, actually. When post apocalyptic cop Judge Dredd (Karl Urban) gets roped into busting a drug-dealing gang holed up on the top floor of a dizzying apartment tower with a new recruit, things get pretty rough pretty fast. Though there are some sci-fi elements here - light psychic powers, some futuristic weaponry and narcotics - the majority of the flick plays out like The Raid: he's outgunned, outmanned and refuses to quit. I'm a huge stan for Karl Urban because of this performance which, when contrasted with a certain Italian stallion's take, is unshowy and really gives the character shape. It just rules.

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Well, there we go. Not an especially long list this month, but February is a short month anyway so whattayagonnado ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ? I hope you find something here to pique your interest and if you do, please reach out: leave a comment on a social media post or leave one below (or both), and let's talk movies! Thanks for reading and thanks to the folks at MovieJawn for hosting and posting! Check out the Hate Watch / Great Watch podcast, which I co-host here on the MovieJawn Podcast Network and as always: Long Live the Movies!