This piece was originally written for the excellent MovieJawn.
Below is my original final draft before and revision / editing.
Plus pictures for added pizzazz.
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Solo: A Star Wars Story is the least satisfying of the new era of Star Wars films.
I wasn't sure what foot I wanted to start my review on, as there is good as well as bad to talk about here, but then I asked myself: "What would Han Solo do?" The answer, famously the subject of much nerd argument, is that Han would shoot first. Shooting first is one of the many things that define who the character of Han Solo is.
What I mean is, were you to make a list of "HAN SOLO AF" qualities and visual trademarks, the phrase "Han shoots first" would most definitely be on there. And that's what this movie is, at its core: a "Han Solo AF" checklist that we watch get crossed off, one box at a time. You knew that's what it would be, deep down. Search your heart. You know it to be true. We all did, right? Maybe not when it initially, but most definitely after the trailer premiered. There's no story here that needed telling to make anything about the Star Wars universe better or fuller or more impactful, it's just: Hey, you wanna see where Han got that blaster? Wanna see him meet Chewbacca? Etc. etc. And the thing with a list like that is, deciding which things are "more important" and should take precedent over others is highly subjective.
