For the last five years or so, I've been compiling Best of the Year -type lists for the movies of that year. Around that time was when I began writing for MovieJawn.com, a site that covers movies (and TV, etc.) because movies are pretty rad. But y'know what? Wrestling is pretty rad too.
I know a bunch of my MovieJawn pals (Jawnies) think so too, which is why *hopefully* in 2022, we'll be starting a podcast to discuss wrestling. While this concept has been kicking around my head for quite some time, it's only recently that it has started to become more realistically plausible. As a result, I've started paying attention to- and thinking about- wrestling matches differently than I used to.
Not entirely, mind you, because there are some matches that are just so chock full of ring psychology and storytelling that you can't *help* but think about it, but largely I would watch wrestling for the face value enjoyment and not really consider the other aspects unless they were brought to my attention. Which, I think, is a totally fine way to enjoy wrestling btw. Generally the worst thing about wrestling is Those Fans (this same axiom applies to most things in my estimation and experience, from punk music to Star Wars and comics and on and on) so as long as you're not shitty or exclusionary to other fans, or the performers, I think everyone should be able to enjoy things how they want.
I have many opinions on wrestling, but I think most will come through or be discussed more fully in the article below - and if not, then why waste time bringing them up in the first place? - but I did want to note one caveat to this list: Most recently, I've primarily been watching AEW. This will definitely change in the future (in fact, when this list goes live I'll have just spent the last two evenings/mornings watching NJPW's Wrestle Kingdom 16, and I'm very excited for that) but for the time being, since that's most of what I watched this past year, that's going to make up a lot of this list. Relatedly I've decided to keep the list short: 5 entries, no muss, no fuss.
Since this is my first time writing about wrestling on here, it's reasonable to presume that it might be your first time reading about wrestling, so I'll give a lot of context for things when applicable. Enjoy!
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5. Lucha Bros. ~vs~ FTR (AEW Rampage, Dec. 10th)
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I've been a fan of the Lucha Bros. - Pentagón El Zero Miedo and Rey Fénix - since their time at Lucha Underground which aired on the El Rey Network (co-founded by director Robert Rodriquez, it will actually be returning quite soon after falling dormant for a few years. No word on the continuation of LU yet though...). Fénix is a high-flyer doing a lot of very acrobatic maneuvers utilizing the ropes and Penta is a brutal striker (his LU trademark was "breaking arms" which I've put in quotations because: not really).
FTR, for their part, put on one of the greatest tag matches I've ever seen in my life back at WWE NXT when they were known as The Revival. Their match against (I believe) Tommaso Ciampa & Johnny Gargano, the first time I'd seen either tag team btw, was just incredible. Honestly quite possibly the single best tag match I've ever watched, putting it pretty high for best match ever. Now, having left WWE for AEW, FTR are known as Dax Harwood and Cash Wheeler.
Real quick. I know I've throwing a lot of initials at you. Would a key help?
- WWE - World Wrestling Entertainment. For quite a while the only game in town that most people would have heard of.
- AEW - All Elite Wrestling. Founded in 2019 with generous financial backing and an eye for fostering talent that's put them over as the strong competition that WWE has been lacking.
- NXT - Doesn't actually stand for anything aside from "Next". WWE's farm team essentially, to help younger wrestlers fine tune their skills and teach them how to be a WWE superstar.
- FTR - Accounts vary. Possibly Fuck The Revival (a knock against their time at WWE) but their entrance video & merch features a logo reading "F*ck The Rest".
- LU - Lucha Underground, but you already knew that. I just didn't want to leave them out.
- Bros. - Short for "Brothers", but you probably, like me, learned that from the Super Mario Bros.
I won't give a play-by-play for the match because it's not about specifics really, it's more about the overall. Each team still utilized their tag styles, but after all the in-ring time together, working with each other, both teams had found how to syncopate their respective rhythms and play to each others' strengths. The Lucha Bros., being brothers, wrestle like a unified force. They watch each other's back, avenge violence against the other, and frequently synchronize their assaults, seeming to strike as one. By contrast FTR are two ring tacticians who trust that the other is doing what needs to be done to best serve their goal: victory.
In a lot of tag matches, you'll notice a lot of waiting. One tag partner will get tossed out of the ring and you'll be able to see them peeking over the apron (the edge of the ring, outside the ropes) to see when they should bother getting back into the mix. In an FTR match, there feels like a lot less of that. They seem to operate like videogame enemies running subroutines; always doing something, always moving, drawing fire from their opponents. FTR's slogan, for a fashion, was "No flips, just fists", emphasizing their striking power and throwing shade at the prevalence of high-flyers in wrestling, but that's not to imply that they're not athletic. In fact, for my money, Cash Wheeler is an absolute genius at putting a move over in the ring. He'll take a clothesline (forearm across the neck) and make it look like it turns him inside out, flipping ass over teakettle and landing like a sack of laundry.
But I digress. In just about 17 minutes, the two teams put on a complete clinic on how to run an incredible tag match. There are some stand out moments: Penta regularly does a thing where he removes his glove and you know it's gonna be bad news. In this match he removes it and then lobs it into the air "distracting" Cash, who catches it as if that was all that matters in the moment and then gets his head kicked off by Penta. A great gag.
There's also a whole sequence that pays homage to the late, great Eddie Guerrero (this may have aired on the anniversary of his birthday or his far too soon passing): Fénix and Cash are having a tug of war through the ropes with the title belt (which the Lucha Bros. currently held) and when Fénix tugs it out of Cash's grip, it hits Dax in the face, knocking him down. The ref didn't see it, so there's no disqualification. Fénix realizes what happened, shrugs his shoulders and does an Eddie Gurrero shoulder shake. The crowd goes wild (who doesn't love Eddie Guerrero?). Almost immediately after, Fénix goes for a Frog Splash (an aerial move where you crunch your arms and legs in and then out before landing on your prone opponent, popularized by Eddie Guerrero who adopted it as tribute to a tag partner who had passed) and just as he's about to land it, Dax brings his knees up with the belt across them, stunning Fénix . The crowd erupts into a popular "This Is Awesome" chant.
Both teams did what they do and they each did it incredibly well, but unlike their previous meetings, everything worked in concert and as a result the match was excellently paced and wall-to-wall with big moments.
4. Lucha Bros. ~vs~ The Young Bucks (AEW All Out, Sept. 5th)
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In contrast to entry #5 above, this match between the Lucha Bros. and the at-the-time tag champions the Young Bucks, this match *is* about specifics because like the Luchas, the Bucks are also brothers and tag in much the same fashion; as a unified front. The Bucks - Nick and Matt Jackson - have a similar style overall to the Luchas: high-flying, creative, fluid, and hard-hitting. The slight difference is that, while the Lucha Bros. slightly different approaches in-ring allow them to balance their strengths and weaknesses, the Bucks have exactly the same skill-sets and frequently rely on out-thinking their opponents when all else fails.
To think of it in Street Fighter II terms, the Luchas are like Ken & Ryu where they programmed one to hit a little harder and the other to be a little faster whereas the Bucks are like when you and a friend both picked the same character, so you both have the same stats but one looks slightly different. Does that clarify anything?
This match has so many amazing spots and synchronized moves that should really be seen to be believed. There's also a lot of blood, fair warning if that's not your thing. But really, if we're being honest the match should have been called based on the entrances alone because while the Bucks did a standard entrance for them: coming out with some of their entourage (I believe this time it was only the lanky glutton-for-punishment Brandon Cutler) and being, generally, the most annoying people in the room. The Bucks used to be the babiest of babyfaces (wrestling speak for "the good guys") but have recently become heels ("bad guys") which has manifested mostly through audacious fashion and ..squawking like a bird during promos? I really want to ask Nick Jackson if he's referencing the Birds of War from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia with that.
So yeah, now they're just obnoxious. And it's great. I will always prefer my heels with a sense of humor; a mustache-twisting villain trying to get under your skin as opposed to tryhard, "toughest, baddest mofo in the room" types but that's personal opinion. Then again, this is my column, so...
Anyway, I don't know why I've spent so long talking about the Bucks' entrance when it doesn't, at all, matter by comparison because: The Lucha Bros. had the best entrance of the year. Their entrance theme "Zero Miedo" begins ("Zero Miedo" translates to "No Fear" and has a corresponding hand gesture: the pointer-finger and thumb circle "OK" sign as "zero" and then bending your wrist so the other three fingers are now pointing down forming an M for "miedo") and is performed live by Mikey Rukus and Muelas de Gallo. Live performances of entrance themes aren't uncommon, but sometimes due to sonic anomalies and/or technical problems, they suck. This did not (it was largely just rapping over a backing track, so that eliminated a lot of the headaches of live music - Milli Vanilli were really onto something and should be, as they say, "critically reappraised"). But wait, there's more! The Lucha Bros. come out wearing, in addition to their usual ring gear, amazing, beautiful Mesoamerican headdresses! The feathers, my god, the feathers! They were enormous! It was so damn cool.
They could have just given them the belts right there.
But no, the match is amazing. It's a cage match for the tag title belts, so the ring is ensconced in a cage made of your garden variety chain link fencing. A common occurrence in cage matches is someone(s) climbing the cage, possibly doing battle while atop it, and usually diving down off of it. That all happens, and not to diminish the danger and excitement of it, that's barely worth mentioning when compared to some of the other moments.
Watching the Bucks collaborate on elaborate moves & combinations is excellent. Stuff like Matt seesawing Penta up into a kick from Nick, or both of them simultaneously dodging kicks from the Lucha Bros. so that the Bros. kick each other in the feet. They also work great in tandem, just one high impact move after another. The Lucha Bros. do this stuff all the time, but the Bucks don't always get the opportunity to put so many of the combinations into one match.
Matt puts on the tack-shoe and attempts a superkick (the Bucks' signature move) on Fénix but Penta intervenes (sacrificing himself for his brother) and Matt makes him pay for it. The Bucks' had earlier tried to tear off the Lucha Bros.' masks (a disgrace in the world of Lucha wrestling) so when Matt starts really laying into Penta with the tack-shoe, the idea is that the tacks are able to his more exposed flesh on his forehead and pretty soon he's covered in blood. A wrestler with their face drenched in blood is referred to as a Crimson Mask btw. Fénix gets revenge eventually, putting the tack-shoe on his hand.
There's also a sequence in the back half of the match where all four men end up in a daisy chain of superkicks that's just pure entertainment.
This match makes the list because both team, excellent normally, really get to showcase their abilities here. They put on a tremendous match that really makes the title shot feel earned.
3. MJF ~vs~ Darby (AEW Full Gear, Nov. 13th)
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Maxwell Jacob Friedman is better than you, and you know it. At least, that's what he believes. A heel whose whole angle is that he can talk a blue streak, for a long time he was undefeated because he would employ some stooge or another (usually a big, double-decker bus of a man known as Wardlow) to interfere in matches, drawing the refs' attention, allowing MJF to pull a foreign object (a championship ring) from his tights (ew!) and clock his opponents in the face.
Usually the matches up to the point that MJF cheated were competent but MJF never looked especially ...good? He's, no joke, amazing on the mic (aside from a few regressive moments here and there that I don't think are excusable solely because "he's a heel"; do better) but he didn't come across as any great shakes.
This match makes the list for completely changing my opinion on MJF as a wrestler.
I really liked Darby Allin initially. His tiny, scrappy, goth-punk, skateboarder aesthetic really works for me, as does his propensity to catapult himself into opponents like he doesn't want to survive. I've since become aware of some unsavory aspects of his personal life that have left a sour taste in my mouth for him as a person. But still, as a performer, I think he's entertaining.
The pairing of the two of them had very little build up. MJF had previously named Darby as one of the "Pillars of AEW" holding the company up not only now but into the future (the other pillars: Jungle Boy, Sammy Guevara, and MJF himself), and shortly thereafter challenged him to a match. There were a few promos, one notably about how MJF was going to mindfreak Darby so much that Darby would lose sight of winning the match in favor or hurting MJF and that would be how MJF would win. Psychologically. Remember that because, like everything MJF does, it's pure unadulterated Heel Shit.
All this is to say that the two had never really had any ring time and had barely even interacted directly in the lead-up to this. So when they hit the ring, it feels pretty cold. This was also the opening match of the Pay-Per-View (but then again, AEW almost always open their shows with absolute bangers so I probably should have been expecting more). Regardless, I was skeptical as to how this would all go.
This match is incredible, not just in the performances from both of them, but, and this is a big deal, for the in-ring storytelling. MJF has a considerable size and weight advantage on Darby, but watching them go through complicated and athletic finger-locked wrestling combinations was riveting! Watching MJF intelligently utilizing his size advantage by stopping Darby's attempt at a Code Red (where you get your opponent bent over, sit on their back and use your ankles in their armpits to flip them over), by just counter-levering and slamming Darby on the mat was awesome. Darby's numerous cannonball spears and signature Coffin Drops (falling back-first onto your opponent from the ring post with your arms crossed on your chest) are pretty much always impressive, but his agility and flexibility are really on display here.
But the in-ring storytelling is what sets it apart. In the pre-TV days, wrestlers could travel around with a buddy or two and do variations of a match. Fans would hear about the So-And-So vs Whoever-The-F match and hope that they'd get to see it. But since nobody had the luxury of watching wrestling week-in and week-out, the performers had to tell a concise story without much preamble. That's where the propensity for cartoonish heroes and villains comes from: you know immediately looking at someone whether you're supposed to cheer or boo 'em. This is the kind of match that could travel in that way.
Pretty early on Darby starts working over MJF's knee. This is a common strategy in wrestling for a smaller guy taking on a bigger one: take out his base and you limit his strength and reach and etc., and then you have the advantage. BUT. Pretty much every time Darby did anything to MJF's knee, he would shortly end up in a situation where he would damage his own lower back. The announce team does a good job of drawing your attention to this, but even without them, you'd know.
After some back-and-forth on top of the ring post, where Darby narrowly avoids a tombstone piledriver (being held upside down by your opponent and slammed down on your head), Darby performs a stunner on MJF (pulling your opponent's jaw down onto your shoulder by holding their head and rapidly sitting or falling down) which Darby then sells as having hurt him as well. Later he leaves a shaken up MJF on the entrance ramp and does that Coffin Drop from the ring post (to be clear: that's an even greater height than in-ring) and as much as it clobbers MJF, it also hurts Darby.
It goes back and forth like that as well. At one point MJF performs that tombstone piledriver on the ring apron, and, like the Coffin Drop spot above, as much as it rocks Darby, it also leaves MJF clutching his knee and groaning.
That's what I mean by in-ring storytelling. You don't have to know anything about these two competitors to understand what they're doing; there's no backstory necessary for this match, they tell it all in their performance. It's masterful, even up to and including MJF inevitably pulling that ring from his trunks (ew!) and sending Darby out to lunch with it.
Special mention to the person in the crowd with a sign reading MJF EATS SLOPPY STEAKS. That's gotta be the sign of the night!
2. Cody Rhodes ~vs~ Andrade El Idolo (AEW Dynamite, Dec. 1st)
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In contrast to the previous entry, this match really works for me *because* of the backstory. It's not even backstory between the two men competing - that's actually largely pretty by-the-book stuff: they fight, they both think they deserved the win, one of them allies himself with the other's enemies, etc. - it's really between one man and the AEW fandom. That man is Cody Rhodes.
Cody is a legacy wrestler. His father (R.I.P.) was The American Dream, Son of a Plumber Dusty Rhodes and Dusty deserves all the accolades ever given to him. A great talker, a dynamic personality, and a genius for the business of wrestling. On top of that, Cody's older brother Dustin is also in the family business (he famously wrestled in WWE as Goldust and is currently at AEW under the sobriquet The Natural), so allegations of nepotism have dogged Cody for a long time. Cody is one of the founders of AEW (having struck out from WWE on his own to start carving a career in the Indies a few years before the formation) and, having wrestling in his blood, he cares deeply about wrestling as a Noble Art (I've capitalized the idea here to help give it the weight that, I think, represents how Cody thinks about it, not to put words into his ...head).
Cody's relationship to his legacy is complicated even beyond the usual emotional reasons, as his has a legal angle due to the way the wrestling industry was largely monopolized for decades. As a result, part of Cody's wrestling identity is that of a guy fighting to get his father the respect he deserves. His entrance music starts with a soundbite of the phrase "Wrestling has more than one royal family". This earnest desire to set the record straight and bring glory to the Rhodes name, as well as his earnest love of wrestling is a bit much for some wrestling fans. Add to that the fact that, as a founder, he has the ear of Tony Khan (AEW founder) and Cody can come off as a bit of a teacher's pet.
These factors have all coalesced against Cody and he is, as is the parlance of the genre, not over. It probably doesn't help that he's a big dork, but that's an educated guess and regardless it's just one more spice in the Cody Rhodes stew.
So yeah, all Cody wants is for the audience to be on his side which as of this match is as a face (again - good guy). So, despite months of matches with all sorts of obviously bad guys trying and sometimes succeeding in handing Cody his ass, and Cody trying and sometimes succeeding to give as good as he got, we have him set in opposition to Andrade El Idolo.
Andrade is also a legacy, a third generation wrestler who has appeared at numerous different companies and is currently working in both AEW and the Lucha Libre AAA promotion. He's a beast in all the best ways, and for you comicbook fans, his AEW entrance gear is heavily reminiscent of the Batman villain Black Mask. Very cool stuff. Seems like a cool guy but I don't know much about him and unfortunately, and not to diminish his contributions to the match, but he isn't really vital to what makes this match work for me (aside from the gravitas that he lends the match of course).
The match was billed as an Atlanta Street Fight (a street fight match denotes certain changes to the rules of competition, notably the addition of foreign objects). AEW especially has a tendency to name the street fight after whichever town they're currently in but essentially an Atlanta Street Fight is fundamentally the same as a Philadelphia Street Fight which is the same as a Minneapolis Street Fight. I personally always enjoy when the foreign objects can reflect the location but that doesn't always happen (the Philadelphia Street Fight lacked for a spot where someone got clobbered in the face with a hot cheesesteak, but that's just my opinion).
So the Street Fight phase starts immediately with both opponents battling through and around the crowd, hitting each other with garbage cans, etc. They both believably throughout the whole match have and lose the upper hand multiple times. Tables are brought out from under the ring at one point and Cody attempts a sneak attack on Andrade which Andrade expertly counters, putting Cody through the table leaned up in the ring corner.
The finale of the match is the memorable moment for me though. Andrade fully sets up a table angled in the ring corner and he and Cody battle up the ropes to the top of the ring post. They've put each other through the ringer this whole match, so this feels like a situation where whomever can land a body slam of some kind from the top turnbuckle (through the table, remember) will probably seal the deal. It honestly goes back and forth and then suddenly a masked person enters the ring in a hood, removes her disguise revealing that she is Cody's wife (and also wrestler) Brandi Rhodes, and that she has two cans of lighter fluid.
Brandi, just for a little bit of context, had been away from wrestling for a little while having recently given birth to their first child but had expressed (on their reality show Rhodes to the Top which, yes I watch and enjoy) her desire to not just return but win the Women's Title. Since her return her ...alignment, we'll say (whether she's a Face or a Heel) has been a bit up for debate. So seeing her set fire to a table (arguably Heel) but to help her husband (arguably Face) is perfect.
So yeah, now the table is on fire, and the short version is that Cody puts Andrade through it, pins him and is finally over with the crowd. But what makes all of this stand out is a few small details. Firstly, the tables AEW use should be fairly familiar to anyone reading this: those folding-leg tables with the plastic coating with an exaggerated wood grain pattern on it, so once it's on fire, that plastic melts and even though most of it contracts away from the center due to tension, there's still just molten plastic on top of this gently flaming table. There's also the way that Cody puts Andrade through the table.
AEW is Cody's sole wresting gig right now, while Andrade is in a few promotions and was scheduled to compete in a title match a week later in AAA, so doing a flaming table spot is a risky maneuver. If he gets hurt and can't compete, he misses out on these other opportunities and potentially damages his momentum within whatever storylines he's involved in there. Conversely, if Cody is injured there's only the one nebula of storytelling to smooth over. So it's actually a very cool move of Andrade to agree to this spot (I also want to point out that Andrade usually wrestles without a shirt but began this match with a full dress shirt and tie on, only to remove them throughout the match despite knowing what was coming - another classy detail and testament to him as a collaborator).
So when Cody lifts Andrade over his shoulder and they fall through the table, Cody takes the brunt of it upon himself. Andrade *does* come down face-first on the edge of a flaming table, to be fair, but Cody falls fully, bodily, through that sumbitch. And he's on fire. Not a lot, but there are some ribbons of burning plastic stuck to his back. Another excellent detail is that when Cody goes for the pin, Andrade (who is supposed to be basically incapacitated) notices that his friend has a bit of flaming plastic on his shoulder that he seems unaware of, so while being pinned for the loss, he tamps out the flame. Not only another example of Andrade just seeming like a Good Dude, but indicative of what I love about wrestling. These people are more than simply coworkers; not just performers trying to look their best alongside others. Andrade being aware enough during the count to tap the fire out but not attempting to break the pin could, in the eyes of fans who dislike fun and generally take things Too Seriously, be seen as a bad choice: breaking Kayfabe.
Kayfabe makes sense in the pre-internet era. You want people to care about your characters and their stories, so you don't let anybody know it's all made up. There are great stories about wrestlers maintaining Kayfabe but that might have to be a separate column sometime later. For now I'll just point out that the new approach to kayfabe is (and *should be*) much closer to the Willing Suspension of Disbelief that all other artforms largely ask of their audience. But there will always be Those Fans who feel smarter by pointing out inaccuracies as though they matter beyond a bit of useless trivia. But again, I digress.
There was an earlier instance of heartwarming camaraderie between "enemies" in the match as well. Andrade always removes an elaborate black skull mask during his entrance, and he is accompanied to the ring by Jose, nominally Andrade's manager, who takes the mask and keeps it in a case. Cody's manager of sorts is Arn Anderson, a mostly retired wrestler who nevertheless still gets in there and mixes things up from time to time. For this match, Andrade entered first and when Cody and Arn arrived at the top of the entrance ramp, Andrade and Jose ran up to start beating on them. During this, Arn misjudged the edge of the ramp and fell off the side. Usually, this would be a really dangerous accident as the ramp can be 10 or 12 feet up from the ground over there (possibly more?), but luckily there was some kind of riser over there this time so he only fell like 3 or 4 feet though he *did* get stuck between the riser and the edge of the stage. And with Cody and Andrade starting the match, that left Jose - who was supposed to be fighting with Arn - with the job of helping get Arn back up onto the stage. Which he does, and immediately starts "punching" Arn (again - Not Really). The camera men correctly cut away from most of that, but a fan-uploaded video shows the whole thing as well as Jose kneeling down mid-"fist fight" to clearly double check that Arn was ok before they both "continued fighting" into the backstage area.
The final thing that I feel is important enough to mention: Atlanta is Cody's home base. He's a hometown boy there and he still entered to boos. So for him to have to literally set himself on fire to get over with his hometown crowd? That's fucked. But it worked!
This match made the list because my dude had to literally set himself on fire to get over *in his hometown* ...but it worked. Congrats, Cody. Even at the time that this match aired I knew it wouldn't last, but it was nice to see everyone acknowledge that regardless how they felt about Cody's character, they could all agree that he earned their respect.
1. Effy ~vs~ Orange Cassidy (GCW Lights Out, July 21st 2019)
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GCW (Game Changer Wrestling) is a promotion I've been aware of, and may have seen a few matches or PPVs from here and there, but I really started to watch much more of in 2021 (thanks mostly to friends Ben and Rosalie - Hi!), and that lead to my introduction to Effy. Effy has a fascinating origin story which I won't recount here, but his sexuality - he is openly and exaggeratedly gay - is tied to his decision to become a wrestler. Not that there aren't, or weren't before, any gay wrestlers, but Effy has effectively weaponized his sexuality into his gimmick and, as a gimmick, it's huge.
Effy enters to "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road" by Elton John, wearing a purple leather jacket covered in spikes and studs, with black briefs that say "Effy" on the crotch and "Daddy" on the rear. In wrestling, there are these common combinations where one wrestler will drag the other by the arm, across the ring into the ropes, then they will rebound back across the ring. This can continue multiple times, with one opponent diving to lay flat on the mat as the other passes right over them, until one or the other wrestler will perform some move on the other. Effy will frequently start this combo, and then, rather than lie down on the mat, he kneels and crotch height, arms spread, mouth open. He aggressively humps opponents' butts. It's camp, it's over the top, it's all in great fun, and it's fantastic.
But importantly he can back it up. Effy may not be the best wrestler in the industry, he's plenty solid enough a performer to carry this huge gimmick and not let you down when it's time to perform. That brings us to Effy's opponent: "Freshly Squeezed" Orange Cassidy. Another huge gimmick. He's basically the most relaxed wrestler ever, a character based on Paul Rudd's performance in Wet Hot American Summer, down to the denim-on-denim ensemble (he even used to enter to Jefferson Starship's "Jane", which opens that film).
There's a concept in wrestling called "no-selling", which means: when someone hits you, you're supposed to react like you've been hit. No-selling can mean a lot depending on the context: that a wrestler is too strong for their opponent, or that they've gone so far around the horn that, to quote Patrick Swayze in Road House: "Pain don't hurt". It can also be a huge sign of disrespect if someone was *supposed* to sell and instead they do not. But that's all no-selling a reaction. Orange Cassidy no-sells actions.
Any time Orange does anything, it's a Big Deal (capitalized for emphasis). A good crowd, a hot crowd, will then start cheering for every single snails-pace kick like they're the most incredible superkicks ever witnessed by human eyes. Orange will perform whole sequences (like the rope-to-rope combo described above) with his hands in his pockets (in fact, he does so little that even him *putting* his hands in his pockets is a huge deal). None of this is a dig at Orange. I love the guy. Love the gimmick.
But boy howdy these are two enormous gimmicks. I put this match on completely unsure of how this was going to go. 50/50 it could be great, could be trash. Luckily, it's great.
The crowd in this gym (?) is so goddamn hot! They are perfectly playing their part, supporting both wrestlers alternately chanting DADDY for Effy, FRESHLY SQUEEZED for Orange, and heartwarmingly BOTH THESE GUYS. This is what's great about wrestling. Going to a venue and contributing to something that you love. Some crowds, some members, are trash and try to make the match about them (notably chanting CM PUNK for years, or appropriating Stone Cold Steve Austin's WHAT? during any and all pauses in a monologue or promo - these are basic bitch moves that are funny at a vanishly small margin yet will never die because, to quote Jay Z: "Some fools just love to perform").
This GCW crowd are so beautiful and supportive, and importantly, razor sharp. They seem to have a hive-mind with how quickly they all get on the same page with a moment.
Effy goads them to taunt Orange, yelling to the crowd "If you could double speed the chants, maybe we'd get him to do something", which the crown reacts to with astonished OOOHs. At one point, Orange does quite a wind-up to putting his hands in his pockets, and to counter, Effy puts his hands down the front of his trunks. The crowd reacts with a HOLY SHIT chant, usually reserved for moments where you genuinely cannot believe what you've just seen.
When Effy removes Orange's trademark sunglasses (taking them off is another Big Deal within the character of Orange), the crowd chants YOU FUCKED UP. Effy humps Orange when he goes to pick them up btw. Perfect. He also manages to remove Orange's hands from his pockets (which one of the announcers *might* equate to lifting Thor's hammer? I've definitely heard that said in a similar situation if not) and Effy puts his own hands in Orange's pockets, prompting a YOU SICK FUCK chant.
Every move from Orange builds (thanks partially to the crowd) to this delirious anti-climax and the crowd e-x-p-l-o-d-e-s! Orange delivers a tiny chop to Effy and Effy yells "Harder you little bitch!". Effy bites Oranges nipple; Orange prepares to jump from the top of the ring post but in typical under-selling Orange fashion, he just describes what the flips would look like by twirling his fingers; at one point, they've both delivered crotch trauma on each other using the ring ropes and the crowd is chanting FIGHT FOREVER! It's all glorious.
It's two enormous gimmicks that could conceivably outshine less talented, less charismatic performers, but the two of them in this exact environment, feeding off of each other (of course) as well as this very generous crowd, put on what is the MOST entertaining match I've seen all year. It's also indicative of what's great about wrestling:
In the end, Orange goes to drink some orange juice (his version of Popeye eating his can of spinach) and Effy kisses him, squeezing his cheeks, forcing Orange to spit the juice into Effy's mouth, meaning that Orange was not getting the boost he needed. Effy hooks the leg and pins him for the win and "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road" hits. But Effy grabs a mic and asks that the music be turned down so that he can thank Orange for a challenging match and then, adorably, ask him out for coffee. Orange, in traditional Orange fashion, doesn't say much and just casually walks over, takes Effy's hand and escorts him from the ring (he even holds the ropes apart!) and they leave the arena with their arms around each other.
In a genre that has a continuing history with toxic masculinity, I could write a whole column about Effy's gimmick going beyond weaponizing homophobia into weaponizing basic sexuality and how his approach to that is brilliant, but my point: It's refreshing to see this end with a meet cute, and for it to go over *huge* with the crowd.
When wrestling is fun, it can be good. And when it's inclusive, it can be great.
FOOTNOTE: I'd like to also shout out Effy's rivalry with Matt Cardona. Cardona's gimmick is being a macho, gym-rat, Long Island bro. They had a back-and-forth in the Indie wrestling circuits that I mostly experienced secondhand on Twitter. It included Cardona surprising Effy with a title challenge and taking a belt from Effy, and thereafter a cycle of taunting each other which peaked for me with Cardona dressing as Effy for Halloween, including commissioning a Cardona-sized version of Effy's leather jacket. Effy pointed out that was gimmick infringement and that Cardona would be hearing from his legal representation.
Also - Cardona has (I'm pretty sure) just adopted that awesome jacket into his regular, non-Effy-baiting ring gear. Which rules.
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So there you have it. Yeah, I cheated a bit by having a match from 2019 as my number 1, but hey this is the year that I first saw it and, need I remind you: this list is free so whatcha gonna do ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. There were, honestly quite a few near-contenders for this list and maybe in future years I'll do a top ten, but as I was well aware that I wouldn't be covering (let alone re-watching) a year's worth of matches, I just went with what jumped readily to mind.
The Adam Page / Bryan Danielson title match that technically became an Iron Man match was pretty close and would have made the list except for the commercial breaks. This was a damn title match and there were like half a dozen picture-in-picture commercial interruptions. For shame. I hope to be able to get a commercial-free DVD of it at some point.
I also want to shout out Eddie Kingston. On top of being a favorite personality and performer of mine throughout the year, *and* becoming my favorite wrestler to quote ("I'm going to catering", "I want this cake", "You ugly man you", "Redeem deez nuts"), he also wrote an amazing piece on his life, mental health, and love of wrestling that everyone should read. I would probably name him my Wrestler of the Year, in case you were wondering.
Anyway, I'm done. I hope you enjoyed reading my ramshackle thoughts directed at home much I love wrestling and what I think makes a good match. I hope you all have a happy, safe, healthy, and generous new year ahead of you. And I hope all the links work.
When the wrestling podcast goes live, I will probably include a link to it here: _____ So if you look there and see something *other* than a blank underline, you should click it and subscribe or whatever.
